Blog | Vlastimil Marek

If I could live with my man again

If I could live with my man again I would be a better woman for him. I wouldn’t be treating him from the position of power (trying to wear trousers in the relationship) because this is a man’s role but I would teach him power of my love. I would hug and caress him more often rather than argue and fight with him.

  I would not be telling him that I’ll be nice to him after he’s nice to me but I would be nice to him first to show him what it means and how it can be to his advantage. I would not force him to fulfill my expectations but I would expect him to live his own life.

And I would not criticize him, because that doesn’t work on men and they get stuck and might never forget such ‘failure’. On the contrary, I would always praise him even for the smallest thing.

I would listen to him more and patronize him less. I already know that men, by using the same words as women, mean different things (as they take everything as instruction) and also that they talk a little but what they say they’ll really do.I wouldn’t get persuaded by my girlfriends to talk about him let alone in negative way. On the contrary, I would always stand by him and protect him even against my girlfriends or my parents. From history and positive examples I know, that if a woman follows her man, particularly in times of crisis, it’ll always make her stronger and then she can be more herself.


And if I wanted him to fix dripping tap I’d mention that I admire his organisational skills because he could always manage to get a good plumber (I would leave this on him as to when and how) and I’d say that I wish the tap would stop dripping.And I would never try to force him to go shopping with me and the more I would admire how he can always get what is needed.I would explain to him every month, that before my period and often during, I might be saying things I don’t really mean – and he shouldn’t take it too seriously (so he wouldn’t be frightened that our relationship is at its end).

And I would put a lot of importance to the fact that he notices my new (already twentieth) jumper or top.I would agree with him on clear signals – for example, if I come around to him naked (no man can resist that) it means I feel like making love. Or if I put a towel around my head, it means I’ve got a headache (so he’d know that there is no crisis and he didn’t do anything wrong). Because I already know that woman’s silence is a torture for a man and that he can easily get confused by a woman.

I would never ask him questions which have no answers, because I know that if a man doesn’t know something he feels ‘defeated’ and takes it as his failure. And I wouldn’t want him to keep telling me and deciding which top looks better on me. I wouldn’t get offended by his ironical remarks because I would know that it is a form of attention and expression of interest.

I would feed him first and then talk with him.

I wouldn’t try to wipe the floor right under the chair he’s sitting on because I know he needs his own space.

I wouldn’t be cross with him for reading newspapers and watching television because I know that this is his way of relaxing after all day’s work.

I would be showing him how attractive he is for me and I would try my best (with my care, tenderness or nudity) to inspire him. I would never be telling him that we don’t belong to each other because he’s so different but I would be admiring him and telling him how beautifully different he is. And I wouldn’t ask him to behave and look like heroes from cheap latino-romantic tv series because they have absolutely nothing to do with real men: it’s a brain-washing to be dependant on using and consuming more (of advertised goods and made up pleasures). I know now, that comparing my man to the airbrushed and polished stars in media is complete non-sense and a beginning of the end of relationships.I wouldn’t be getting ready for twenty minutes to make love to him late at night because I know that inactivity makes him feel useless and he could fall asleep but I would make love to him first and then go to the bathroom. I know that while woman’s skin all over her body is ten times more sensitive than man’s, he’s in fact only sensitive on that particular part. Therefore, given by evolution he can not have a clue how to caress me. And also, that it’s difficult for him to satisfy my needs while he’s happy and satisfied if I just come around naked to him. 

If I could live with my man again I would be forthcoming, loving and accepting woman to him and he would be more relaxed and at the same time strong, caring and supporting man for me.